Muybridge is So Cool He's Gotta Wear Shades

  Muybridge is So Cool; He's Gotta Wear Shades

3D TV and the Consumer Electronic Follies

 Technical buzzwords are such evocative things, love 'em or hate 'em, they help us to wrap our heads around complicated concepts and give the Marketers something to peddle to the masses and snake oil carpetbaggers a new label to misappropriate. 

When High-definition panels started to really take traction in the home market, HD became the buzzword that every manufacturer, tech magazine, and consumer electronics device had to include – regardless of the actual ability to do anything constructive with an HD signal. 

Many of you who, as I do, spend many undesired hours awake at 2 am will recall ads for HD vision glasses. The ad's line is- 'See in HD'! An associate who will remain anonymous to lessen his shame bought a pair and claimed that they work but give him a headache after a few hours. If the glasses were not enough, a few days ago, I heard an advertisement for a 3D-branded electric shaver; my head hurts thinking about that.

Speaking of Headaches and 3D.

 3D is everywhere, or at least the promise of it for the mass market is the talk of every AV magazine, blog, and Box Store' sales associate'. If you haven't heard the ceaseless din of 3D-ready devices and displays, I can presume you still use a TV that will change channels if an errant slinky is nearby. The last time I heard such over hype was when they announced the (never released) Brenda Starr movie.

The success of Avatar whipped up a frenzy amongst integrators and manufacturers in a down economy looking for any path that could generate revenue. From system upgrades and hardware sales to movie productions and disc sales, yes, indeed, 3D could just save the Earth from becoming an interstellar highway bypass. 

The Road To Nausea  

As a kid, I watched with religious fervor the WPIX broadcasts of the 1940s and 50's movies on Sunday afternoons. The station ran trailers between the Abbot and Costello features to fill in time. Invariably, at least one Vincent Price 3D trailer was shown. Watching these films in the theater must have made one feel like Marty Feldman on a hyperthyroidism bender; at least, that is how I felt upon leaving the theater after watching Avatar. 

Honestly, what other AV technology has the AMA warning against '…pregnant women, the elderly, and drunks…" from using 3D displays? Nintendo has put out a warning that children under six should not use the 3DS at all. Will theaters have to start stationing nurses outside or have patrons sign a release prior to viewing, just as producers for 'The Blob' did? Except this time, will it be for real?

Is this really the legacy of Muybridge's work and gentle afternoons in Victorian sitting rooms with Stereoscopic viewers? Is there a mass audience who wants to enjoy ducking flyspecks or Leonopteryx poop flying out at them from the screen in the comfort of their home? 

 A Short History Lesson

Muybridge created a series of 'animal locomotion 'photos using multiple cameras, strobes, and a wire trigger system. If you do not recognize Muybridge, you have been exposed to his work numerous times; most folks have seen 'woman descending stairs'- whether you intended to or not. The 'locomotion studies' showed animals of all species running and jumping; most contained studies of human locomotion. 

Most of the human locomotion photos studied female models in gauzy material. Not surprisingly, Muybridge's lectures were restricted to male audience members only. Thomas Edison later bought a large section of Muybridge's work and equipment and sequestered himself in his Secaucus, NJ lab, where the first motion pictures were soon after 'invented.'

The connection? Pundits of the time gave very little credence to Mr. Edison or Muybridge's creations aside from a passing fancy.

Shady Shades

Of course, 3D has a future; the question is, will it revolutionize the way we watch media at home? Just as with HD and surround sound, the results are stunning when it is done right; when done wrong, it can make you physically ill.

 

I do not see 3D becoming the de facto way to present media. Gaming and interactive training concepts work really well, but I still cannot see myself and my friends gathered around the TV wearing silly glasses and jockeying for the 'sweet' spot during a game. Yes, I have seen demos at Infocomm and CEDIA, but the experience is always singular- encased and separated from my fellow viewers by a hunk of hardware on my head. 

Besides, I am more of a Blue-Blockers kinda guy.